"How Is Your Day Today, Going?" or I Clean Myself w/ a Hose or Complete Prostration (pick your favorite)

One of my teachers says, "On the outside, India is chaos, but underneath the surface, there is order."

Well, I've been looking very carefully underneath, and I'm still getting mostly chaos. . . I'll keep looking though.

Another one of my teachers says, "You don't come to India to learn about yoga, you come to India to learn about life. If you wanna learn about yoga, go to LA."

And that kind of nails it for me.

You very quickly learn to let go of all your material comforts and expectations. Either that or you leave. Total surrender, complete prostration, and when you think it's complete you wake up and realize there is so much more, every g-damn f-ing day.

Like, oh I'm sick. . . again, or oh no water today, or oh this wild dog is attacking us, or oh no towels or soap at this hotel, or oh i'm being mugged. . . again (an Indian mugging is a combination of transaction, relentless begging, and mild threat).

It is the ugliest, dirtiest, noisiest, depraved place I've ever seen. People literally dying on the streets in the cities, the air choking, horns nonstop, touts/ beggars all up in you.

I'm waiting to see someone running on fire. That's basically the only thing I haven't seen yet.

And yet, I'm having the time of my life, and even though every day I want to come home, I know that this is exactly where I'm supposed to be, doing exactly what I'm doing.

I left the yoga retreat in Goa sobbing. It was the most transformative experience of my life. It was like fucking Survivor, no hot water, no toilet paper, just a hose and perhaps 14 of the most enlightened people I've ever met -all from LA none the less. We all struggled, all of us a bit sick, yet we practiced every day, we did kirtan at dawn and dusk every day, we supported eachother 24-7, and not once was there any self wrought drama.

But this is India so there was drama every day; charging bulls, taxis running us over and fireworks (of course). And several of the most beautiful, humbling, amazing, and funny experiences of my life which I'll get to individually in a bit. . .

For now, I'm in Pondicherry starting my volunteer work on Monday. I've never felt so blessed. Yet, at the same time, I'm missing home so much it's breaking my heart.

And that is India.

To be continued.

Much love,
yt